Parents-Part 1

Sometimes working with parents can be harder than working with kids. Certain things that parents do irk me to no end. Parents like....

1. The parent who is so focused on the child's achievements that they overlook the child.

These parents are overly concerned about the fact that their 2.5 year old isn't potty trained yet, can't balance on one foot for very long, can't write their name, can't draw a perfect circle, doesn't hold scissors correctly, scribbles instead of drawing a pretty picture, etc.

It's frustrating and sad for me to deal with these parents. I can explain until I'm blue in the face that 2.5 year olds aren't supposed to be masters of all of these skills. It is a process that cannot be forced. 2.5 year olds DO scribble, they DO generally lack the coordination to use scissors "correctly", many do not even recognize their name much less write it. 2.5 year olds don't have the best balance on 2 feet, much less on one. Potty training is a bodily maturity thing and has nothing to do with how smart a child is.

The sad part, for me, is that I think these parents overlook or just don't see what qualities their children DO have. The great personalities, the glimmer in their eye when they figure something out for themselves, the way they love unconditionally, the way they help other children, the way they can accomplish a task if given the right guidance. I could go on but I won't.

I feel like these parents are setting their children up for failure. If the parents are always focused on what their child CAN'T do, they miss what their child CAN do. Children pick up on that. They generally want to please their parents and will attempt to do what the parent wants them to do. If what the parent wants them to do is above their abilities, they get frustrated and discouraged. This can lead to a cycle that is not good for anybody involved. The child is frustrated, the parent is frustrated, and the child cannot grow and learn as well as they could before they were pressured to do what they did not have the ability to do.