The Emotional Rollercoaster

First of all, just let me say thank you to all for all of the support you've given me. I really appreciate it.

Now onto the other news. This morning I woke up and felt nauseous. My first thought was morning sickness. I ate a piece of toast and felt better. I made a Dr. appointment with an OB here in town. Then I went to the bathroom. I was bleeding. I grabbed the extra pregnancy test that was in the cabinet and took it. Waited the required 2 minutes. It was negative. I called my regular doctor and I'm going in tomorrow to have a blood test.

Then came the emotions. On one hand, and I know it sounds bad, I'll be glad if I'm not pregnant. On the other, it's a bit of a let down. Not that the pregnancy was planned, but I had wrapped my brain around being pregnant and having a baby in the fall. There's so many positive things for us if I'm not pregnant. Not that a pregnancy would be a negative thing, but not being pregnant would allow us to save for the future, finish school on time, and be less stressed.

So I don't really know what's going to happen. The nausea can be explained away by other things, mainly that the little girl I watch is sick, and I was with her for 36 hrs straight during the time when she was most contagious. But it can also be explained by a pregnancy. I will keep you updated when I know. Wish me luck--though I'm not really sure what I want the outcome to be.